Build a $30 Charcuterie Board from Trader Joe’s (& that includes wine!)
Psst: if you’re just here for the downloadable list, that’s fine! Scroll waaaay down to the bottom and you’ll find it. Happy cheesing!
Here’s the thing. If I make a trip to the grocery store without a list or some sort of “plan”, one of two things are going to happen. I either:
- Leave the store with next to nothing because I get overwhelmed and can’t put together a list in my head of what I need for “this” recipe or “that” dish. Waste of time.
- Leave the store with WAY more than what I need because I spent an hour perusing the aisles, finding all sorts of things I’ve never tried before and throw it in my cart. Waste of money.
Without fail, if I don’t come prepared to stores like Giant Eagle or Kroger without a plan, it’s bad news.
Enter Trader Joe’s.
Chances are, if you clicked the link to read this post you’ve been to Trader Joe’s before. Or maybe you just like charcuterie! Either way, you have some sort of idea of the magic that lies within a Trader Joe’s store. Anything I’ve bought on a whim from that store I have LOVED and ends up becoming a staple in my weekly list. If you haven’t tried any of their famous items like the Cauliflower Gnocci, Everything But the Bagel Seasoning, or Cauliflower Pizza Crust, you’re truly missing out.
But their items for a Charcuterie Board? KILLER. All under $30, including a bottle of wine. (Another TJ’s staple—their surprisingly tasty selection of wine bottles for only $3.99.) So let’s get started!
One of the first things to keep in mind when putting together a charcuterie board is that it’s VERY easy to get carried away picking out lots of “little things” to add to the board. Sure, the key to a great cheese platter is having variety! However, getting carried away = $$$. It’s important to keep in mind how large the board is that you’re trying to fill, because more than likely you need less than you think.
You can trust me from experience here—the first time I made a charcuterie board for a friend and I (yes, only TWO people) I spent over $80 at the store, only to realize when I got home that I could only fit about 20% of each of the products that I bought on the board, and the rest went in my fridge for meat and cheese snacking for the next 2 weeks. Smaller portions are better! There are a few exceptions to this rule, and we’ll cover them when we get to it.
First is cheese.
Like most grocery stores, Trader Joe’s has a variety of different types of cheese packaged to size. This means that you can get a HUGE chunk of brie for $8, or you can be a little more conservative and get a healthy-sized slice for only $2-$3. Like I mentioned before, variety is key—spend less on little pieces of cheese so you can have more varieties! For aesthetic purposes, try to pick out cheeses that have different shapes/flavors. Even though the cheddar I bought came in a rectangle (I’ll admit, I broke my own rule and bought WAY too big of a block), I cut it up into cubes to give a different shape from the other cheeses.
A good starting point is three different types of cheese. I went with:
- $2.99 Goat Cheese—crumbles well onto a cracker spread with jam.
- $3.77 Brie—a Crave Columbus cheese board staple, I’m sorry but it’s NOT a true board without brie.
- $3.51 Cheddar—it’s a safe bet, even the picky eaters love cubed cheddar!
Next, let’s add some fruit.
This is the cheap part! Buying small portions of fruit won’t make a huge dent in your charcuterie board budget, and I actually don’t mind if I have leftovers in the fridge from these. Grapes are the perfect snacking food. All I needed for this was:
- $0.69 Granny Smith Apple
- $2.99 Green Grapes
Even if you only purchase two different types of fruits, you can spread them apart on the board to give the allusion of variety. Magic!
If you’re a vegetarian and reading this post, congratulations—collect $200 and pass GO. Okay, more like “save ten bucks and skip to the next paragraph”, but you get it. Vegetarian charcuterie boards are still just as delish as the real thing, and you can afford to splurge a little more on other things like fancy jams, nuts, or (gasp) more cheese. No one ever complains about more cheese.
HERE COMES THE TRADER JOE’S MEAT
I learned a cool trick from reading Jess’s (Plays Well With Butter) post on making a $25 charcuterie board from ALDI.
Variety packs are your best friend.
This goes for meats, cheeses (if available), and ESPECIALLY crackers. Trader Joe’s has this bomb “Gourmet Deli Selection” package of three different types of meat cuts for only $5.49:
Although this and cheese will probably be two of the most expensive things on your receipt, they’re also the All-Stars of the board, so don’t sweat it. This variety pack comes with:
- Calabrese Salami—a very thin-cut salami that pairs well with the cheddar cubes.
- Prosciutto—my all-time favorite, I slather a slice of this ultra-thin cut with goat cheese or brie and drift away in fatty bliss.
- Capocollo—this is a cross between prosciuotto and sausage, and is often slow roasted and smoked. You can’t go wrong!
When plating your board with the meat, the aesthetic tip here is to “present” your meats in a different way. E.g.: Fold, roll, and bunch. Here, I rolled my Calabrese salami, folded my capocollo like an accordion, and very delicately bunched the prosciutto.
If you’re looking for a little more meat for your hearty audience, TJ’s also has a fantastic roll of summer sausage for only $2.99. Although this doesn’t fit into our $30 budget, it’s a yummy option to keep in mind!
Next: Breads, Crackers, and Everything Else
Here’s where you can have a little fun! Trader Joe’s has a great cracker variety pack for $3.49, which makes it easy to add some different shapes and options to your board. No, the amount of crackers on my current board are not realistic for a real party, but I will typically arrange the rest of the crackers on their own plate for everyone to grab-and-assemble.
I found my own little surprise while shopping for this post—I dieddd over this pretzel bread. It’s AMAZING!
The loaf is super light, tastes just like a giant soft pretzel, and bonus—it’s 99 cents! I already have future blog recipes in mind for this little guy. For charcuterie board purposes, I would slice and toast this little guy and throw him on the board for a fancier-than-a-cracker pairing option for the jam.
And while we’re talking about jam…
One of the super kind employees at Trader Joe’s (aren’t they all super kind though? Like is that a job requirement??) let me know that TJ’s has a special seasonal item in their jams and jellies section that is always changing. Because it’s fall, I got to try this little guy—and I was blown away! $3.99 Apple Cider Jam or Pumpkin Butter, you can’t go wrong with these spreading options for your board.
This is another item that is a little on the pricier side that you could give up if you have homemade jam already in your fridge, but I just love trying their seasonal selections. Tip: If you’re reading this in the spring/summertime and are looking for a seasonal jam, the peach is To. Die. For.
A few other things I added to my board for fun:
- A can of Black Olives—an easy $0.99 add and if you’re anything like me, I could sit there and eat a whole can of olives in one sitting. Oh, no? Lol oops guess I’m weird. Skip this if you want, but it’s a pretty (and cheap) addition to the board. Who knows, maybe you’ll have a friend like me that eats ‘em all up!
- Nuts—here’s where I break the “cost” rules a little bit. My Trader Joe’s only offered almonds or any other types of nuts in HUGE bags. Which to be fair, is how I want to buy them most of the time because it’s cost-effective. Buy a bag of nuts that you know you’ll snack on during the week and it will make it worth it. I bought a 1LB bag of almonds for $5.99, but only used a handful for sprinking around the tray. For the $30 Trader Joe’s Charcuterie Board purposes, we’ll say that this cost: $5.99 x 1/8 of the bag = $0.75. Cheating, maybe, but I think it’s the fair kind of cheating because you’ll eat the rest of the bag yourself anyway—and it’s still a good price!
Last but not least, the wine.
Like I said before, Trader Joe’s has a bomb-asz selection of $3.99 wine. Do I suggest you chug an entire bottle for yourself in one evening, expecting no hangover the next morning? Ehhh, no. But it does the job and you won’t be choking it down like a bottle of Sutter Homes. Try it, you might like it!
Your board: What ties it all together:
If you don’t own a good-quality cutting board that’s used for more than just cutting (hosting, duh!), I suggest investing in one. I absolutely love the dimension that wooden cutting boards (CIRCLE) or (RECTANGLE) give to the look, I love how the color compliments all of the browns, yellows, and reds in my charcuterie ingredients. But right now, marble ones are VERY trendy and probably my favorite!
Board Accessories: Make it Fun!
Marble Cheese Knives – White bowls for olives – Charcuterie Cookbook
That’s it for my $30 Trader Joe’s Charcuterie Board post—print this cheat sheet out and impress your closest pals at this year’s Friendsgiving with the prettiest cheese board they’ve ever seen!
Heads up: This post was not affiliated with Trader Joe’s. I just like, really love Trader Joe’s. Happy snacking!
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